After my allergen binge, you know, when I decided to make a lifestyle change, I went to the store to get some food. It was 10:30pm... My choices were pretty much limited but I was going to find some food I could eat "safely". I went to Walmart. In Alaska, we lack a couple of things, first off places that are open 24 hours. We have Walmart and Carrs. I got a cart, spent 2 hours looking for corn/dairy/etc free food. I was getting very frustrated looking at everything I used to be able to eat and finding corn in it. When I was almost done with the store (2 hours later) I looked in my cart and thought, "Hmmm, I did okay. I have quite a bit of food in here". Well, $137 and 2 hours later, when I got home and took it out of the 5 bags, I was sadly mistaken. I decided to put it all on the counter so I could see at a moments notice what I could eat, until I got used to this whole new lifestyle. It was depressing. Everything I could eat, neatly surrounded my straw holder. It was like my corn free food was sitting around worshiping the straws that I probably can't use anymore because of something corny! I got depressed!
I finally found an allergic to corn forum and joined it! This is where I learned about Passover! I love Passover! I went to Carrs and found the Kosher "isle". I found dark chocolate, marshmallows, cakes, cookies, all sorts of sweet stuff, but not stuff that would be good for me to eat. I did find the organic isle though. Let me get one thing straight though, just because it's organic doesn't mean it is corn/dairy free. I read a lot of labels these days! I found some good stuff though. I found more fake cheese, fake bacon, fake sour cream, fake ice cream, tator tots that are not doused in corn syrup to help them brown, pita chips, and many more things. It was amazing! Another $95.00 and 3 bags later, I thought I had food again. I thought wrong...again!
I tried the ice cream, it's not so bad, but it's not so good either. The bacon is good, with something, like a BLT or on a breakfast burrito. It is not good at all by itself! The cheese, leaves a lot to be desired. The taste isn't so bad, it's the aftertaste. Oh yeah, it also doesn't melt! And for $4.00 for 12 slices it should not only melt, but be cooking itself! I keep rationalizing that I will soon forget what real food tastes like and be happy with my new taste buds and fake food. I just want to know when this day will come!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Diet Coke....Holy Water?
One hangover weekend back in college, we have all had them don't play innocent on me, I accidentally on purpose called Diet Coke "Holy Water". I am Catholic. Oops. However, Diet Coke is a really excellent hangover cure, and in Mount Pleasant (I think it was Central/Western Weekend, or maybe it was the unemployment weekend, or was it...you get the point) there is a Burger King that has the fountain soda (I've lived outside of Michigan for far too long) machine in the lobby. This makes for the perfect Sunday post hang over hangout! They are all understanding college students themselves, well mostly, so they understand. They will let you hang out there all day long buying just a large soda to share with 12 people! They know you won't cause too much of a scene, your head can't handle any noise yet. It's once the sunglasses come off that they might start to worry a little bit. I recall the moment like it was yesterday, comparing diet coke to holy water. Could this blasphemy really be what caused this corn allergy?
Of course it didn't, but the diet coke is still mocking me on a daily basis. I have a half a case of it sitting by the door, waiting to go to a new home. I can't bear to watch it leave....I'm a sad sad individual! I keep hoping that tomorrow I will wake up from that dream of corn (yes, I sometimes dream of a pile of corn dripping in sweet succulent butter, sometimes I am swimming in a pool of it) and be able to drink my diet coke for breakfast....fat chance, but I keep hoping! When I think of diet coke, I often hear a soundtrack, which is Daft Punk, One More Time. "Just one more time, we're gonna celebrate, you and me got me feeling so free....diet coke...."
Maybe I haven't lost my Corny, perhaps I'm allergic to myself!
Of course it didn't, but the diet coke is still mocking me on a daily basis. I have a half a case of it sitting by the door, waiting to go to a new home. I can't bear to watch it leave....I'm a sad sad individual! I keep hoping that tomorrow I will wake up from that dream of corn (yes, I sometimes dream of a pile of corn dripping in sweet succulent butter, sometimes I am swimming in a pool of it) and be able to drink my diet coke for breakfast....fat chance, but I keep hoping! When I think of diet coke, I often hear a soundtrack, which is Daft Punk, One More Time. "Just one more time, we're gonna celebrate, you and me got me feeling so free....diet coke...."
Maybe I haven't lost my Corny, perhaps I'm allergic to myself!
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
A whole new outlook
Okay, yeah, right, I didn't have a whole new outlook. I was not convinced that these allergies were a blessing, but I was trying! First thing I did was kept repeating, until I believed it, that my allergies weren't new! They were something that had been there for quite some time. I sat thinking, and by "sat thinking" I mean I stood in the shower thinking (as all the women out there know, this is where we do our best thinking...our PEACEFUL spot) about what it felt like to eat pain free, to not ache everyday, to go through a day not exhausted, and furthermore, just being healthy. I could not remember. This thought made me sad, and I am not one to be sad, so I had to put a stop to this! I wanted to be healthy. I wanted to remember how it felt to live a day without pain! I remembered back to that unnecessary gallbladder surgery and the fairytale I was told, I would feel so much better. If I let a stranger cut into me and remove an organ, I can let another stranger tell me my allergies and try out this new lifestyle.
That last word, lifestyle, was my next step. I reasoned that I was no on a diet. Diets can be cheated, I'm pretty sure the word is derived from some ancient form of cheating. Everyone I heave ever encountered has cheated on their diet, it's whether they will admit it or not. With a diet, you can eat some ice cream, spend a little extra time on the treadmill and voila, cheating is okay! You can't cheat when you have an allergy. Swollen lips? Cheaper than collegian injections and probably about as comfortable! Anaphaltic shock? Well...what is good about that?! Is ice cream really worth it? The word diet also implies that it is short term. Most people go on a diet lose 10-20 pounds then say they will continue the new healthy habits. Most people, in my experiences, continue for a month or so until the bad habits creep back in. So, no, I am not on a restricted diet!
I decided that I am going through a lifestyle change. I am making an appointment with a dietitian (or as I will call her, a lifestyle coordinator, who cares what she went to school for?) I have bought some "safe" foods. I have found that Passover is now my favorite holiday of all, and I am not ever Jewish. Lifestyle change!
That last word, lifestyle, was my next step. I reasoned that I was no on a diet. Diets can be cheated, I'm pretty sure the word is derived from some ancient form of cheating. Everyone I heave ever encountered has cheated on their diet, it's whether they will admit it or not. With a diet, you can eat some ice cream, spend a little extra time on the treadmill and voila, cheating is okay! You can't cheat when you have an allergy. Swollen lips? Cheaper than collegian injections and probably about as comfortable! Anaphaltic shock? Well...what is good about that?! Is ice cream really worth it? The word diet also implies that it is short term. Most people go on a diet lose 10-20 pounds then say they will continue the new healthy habits. Most people, in my experiences, continue for a month or so until the bad habits creep back in. So, no, I am not on a restricted diet!
I decided that I am going through a lifestyle change. I am making an appointment with a dietitian (or as I will call her, a lifestyle coordinator, who cares what she went to school for?) I have bought some "safe" foods. I have found that Passover is now my favorite holiday of all, and I am not ever Jewish. Lifestyle change!
A breakdown of the offenders....
Green Beans: I love me some green bean casserole! I even have a dish devoted exclusively to my green bean casserole. How am I going to survive the holidays?!?!? Once, I had a handle on the face that I really didn't eat that all that often anyway, but still loved them, I calmed down a bit and headed to my next tragedy.
Peas and Pork: I feel I can lump these two together because I like them both, but they never have been a number one choice for me. Growing up, I hated pork chops, pork tenderloin, bacon, pretty much everything but honey ham and processed lunch meat. Peas on the other hand, does anyone ever say, "Man, I wish I had some peas right now! I am craving them!" Let me answer that for you...NO! In my experience if peas are needed and you don't have any then you skip adding them. You do not make a special trip to the store just for peas!
Cow's Milk: Eh, I can deal with this one. I'm a big fan of soy milk I have found out!
The last allergy is the one getting under my skin. CORN! I am allergic to corn! That wonderful yellow kernel of sweet deliciousness is my nemesis. When I was first processing this information, I was okay with it. Okay, so I can't eat corn on the cob this summer, it's not like I live in Iowa anyway! There are no corn fields in Alaska! Oh...and that creamed corn casserole I like so much, oh well, I eat that about once a year.
As the doctor started going more in depth, I kind of on purpose, quit listening. Corn is in everything! I was told I could make an appointment with the dietitian, but since I hadn't been listening to how my life was about to change, I declined. None of this hit me until I made it home and started going through my new binder full of information. I wanted to fall into a crumpled mess and admit defeat, but instead I took a very long, very hot shower to divert my attention from my new life!
I really wasn't ready to make these changes to my life. Once out of the shower, I decided a binge of my allergens was in order. Since I was giving up everything that I lived for (yes, I do live for diet coke), I thought I deserved all the corn and corn bi-products I could cram into a day. I would eat my favorites ONE LAST TIME! Wow! That was a mistake! Big mistake!
For breakfast, I had a jalapeno and cheese bagel with bacon, egg, and cheese. I washed it down with a diet coke. For breakfast dessert, yes, I went this far, I had half a bag of Cadbary Mini Eggs. I did not feel good! My stomach was killing me. I still hadn't learned my lesson from breakfast by the time dinner rolled around. So, for dinner I had the diet coke staple, a cheeseburger with ketchup on a jalapeno and cheese bagel. I followed that with the other half of the mini eggs. I was in pain, I didn't sleep well, I had nightmares, I knew it was time to give up the allergens and make a change...
Peas and Pork: I feel I can lump these two together because I like them both, but they never have been a number one choice for me. Growing up, I hated pork chops, pork tenderloin, bacon, pretty much everything but honey ham and processed lunch meat. Peas on the other hand, does anyone ever say, "Man, I wish I had some peas right now! I am craving them!" Let me answer that for you...NO! In my experience if peas are needed and you don't have any then you skip adding them. You do not make a special trip to the store just for peas!
Cow's Milk: Eh, I can deal with this one. I'm a big fan of soy milk I have found out!
The last allergy is the one getting under my skin. CORN! I am allergic to corn! That wonderful yellow kernel of sweet deliciousness is my nemesis. When I was first processing this information, I was okay with it. Okay, so I can't eat corn on the cob this summer, it's not like I live in Iowa anyway! There are no corn fields in Alaska! Oh...and that creamed corn casserole I like so much, oh well, I eat that about once a year.
As the doctor started going more in depth, I kind of on purpose, quit listening. Corn is in everything! I was told I could make an appointment with the dietitian, but since I hadn't been listening to how my life was about to change, I declined. None of this hit me until I made it home and started going through my new binder full of information. I wanted to fall into a crumpled mess and admit defeat, but instead I took a very long, very hot shower to divert my attention from my new life!
I really wasn't ready to make these changes to my life. Once out of the shower, I decided a binge of my allergens was in order. Since I was giving up everything that I lived for (yes, I do live for diet coke), I thought I deserved all the corn and corn bi-products I could cram into a day. I would eat my favorites ONE LAST TIME! Wow! That was a mistake! Big mistake!
For breakfast, I had a jalapeno and cheese bagel with bacon, egg, and cheese. I washed it down with a diet coke. For breakfast dessert, yes, I went this far, I had half a bag of Cadbary Mini Eggs. I did not feel good! My stomach was killing me. I still hadn't learned my lesson from breakfast by the time dinner rolled around. So, for dinner I had the diet coke staple, a cheeseburger with ketchup on a jalapeno and cheese bagel. I followed that with the other half of the mini eggs. I was in pain, I didn't sleep well, I had nightmares, I knew it was time to give up the allergens and make a change...
Hahaha, I am so corny...well not anymore :)
Last week, I visited an allergist for the first time in my life. I left less than thrilled, but optimistic, nonetheless. My background was complicated, I was referred to as the "perfect allergy patient". My appointment was to take 2-3 hours initially. The allergies I knew about were: latex, several medicines, cat, dog, mold, strong perfumes, detergents with perfumes and dyes, along with pumpkin and cranberry. My appointment lasted five hours!!!
All of my life, I have have asthma. Sure, when I was young, it was really bad, but I managed to live a normal life. As far as I am concerned, I still do, well that was up until March 24, 2011, which is when I got my allergy results. I have also been having stomach problems for years. I was always going to the doctor and/or ER. One day in November 2010, I had a veggie sub from Subway and had a "gallbladder attack". I was hospitalized for three days and was promised health and pain-free eating.
HA! No such luck! For six weeks, I ate nothing but soup, as it seemed to be the only thing that didn't hurt as much. The gallbladder surgeon referred me to a gastroentrologist. He was hopeful for some ulcers. I wasn't, but I'd give everything I have now if I could trade it in for a couple, bleeding even! I had an endoscopy done, along with several more tests and appointments. When nothing turned up, he referred me to an OB/GYN (irregular periods could lead to stomach pains) and an allergist (maybe I was eating foods I was allergic to).
I got an appointment almost immediately for the OB/GYN. although, I have ovarian cysts and endrometriosis, neither is the cause of my abdominal pain after I eat. This pain, ironically enough, is right where my gallbladder used to be! The appointment with the allergist took a couple more months.
Now, here four months after I had my gallbladder removed, I have learned that I am allergic to my LIFE!!! Out of the the 30 possible foods I was tested for, I was only allergic to five...not bad right? HA!
I am allergic to cow's milk, green beans, peas, pork, and corn! This blog is by no means medical advice, it's merely a place for me get my feelings out and hopefully encourage others with food allergies. Let's all laugh at my mistakes on my journey! I have have a few already and expect to have many more!
All of my life, I have have asthma. Sure, when I was young, it was really bad, but I managed to live a normal life. As far as I am concerned, I still do, well that was up until March 24, 2011, which is when I got my allergy results. I have also been having stomach problems for years. I was always going to the doctor and/or ER. One day in November 2010, I had a veggie sub from Subway and had a "gallbladder attack". I was hospitalized for three days and was promised health and pain-free eating.
HA! No such luck! For six weeks, I ate nothing but soup, as it seemed to be the only thing that didn't hurt as much. The gallbladder surgeon referred me to a gastroentrologist. He was hopeful for some ulcers. I wasn't, but I'd give everything I have now if I could trade it in for a couple, bleeding even! I had an endoscopy done, along with several more tests and appointments. When nothing turned up, he referred me to an OB/GYN (irregular periods could lead to stomach pains) and an allergist (maybe I was eating foods I was allergic to).
I got an appointment almost immediately for the OB/GYN. although, I have ovarian cysts and endrometriosis, neither is the cause of my abdominal pain after I eat. This pain, ironically enough, is right where my gallbladder used to be! The appointment with the allergist took a couple more months.
Now, here four months after I had my gallbladder removed, I have learned that I am allergic to my LIFE!!! Out of the the 30 possible foods I was tested for, I was only allergic to five...not bad right? HA!
I am allergic to cow's milk, green beans, peas, pork, and corn! This blog is by no means medical advice, it's merely a place for me get my feelings out and hopefully encourage others with food allergies. Let's all laugh at my mistakes on my journey! I have have a few already and expect to have many more!
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